I Go to a Pulmonologist

I'm not a rabbi. Not even close. So I'm not going to pasken whether or not I'm allowed to tell you that I think this Jewish guy is a lousy doctor. Is that considered loshon horah (evil talk, gossip)? Maybe it's my responsibility to warn people about him. I dunno. So maybe I'll just change his name. Yeah, that's what I'll do, I'll change his name! Okay what's a good name for a Jewish doctor? A lung doctor. I got it! Dr. Kennish Aitemen*. Perfect.
So I went to see Dr. Katzenelenbogen** and he suggested I go see Dr. Aitemen. I had seen Dr. Aitemen about four years before. I waited in his office four hours. The girl in the office told me he had an emergency. I mailed him my $40.00 copay in pennies. I don't know if he was amused.
This time I told myself that if I had to wait more than two hours I would up and leave; my time was worth something too, gosh darnit! The fact that I couldn't breathe hardly entered into the equation. I was in the waiting room about an hour and a half when I was called into the examining room. Damn! I didn't even have an excuse to leave! The doctor said I was wheezing. Duh! Said I was congested. Double duh! Did what they call the "six-minute walk" test where you walk for, that's right, six minutes, and they measure your heart rate and the oxygen saturation of your blood every so often with a pulse oximeter, one of those little thingys they put on your finger in the hospital. After careful deliberation, Dr. Aitemen determined that I was having trouble breathing and could probably benefit from an inhaler. I think he actually said all this with a straight face. He had a few fancy diplomas and degrees on the wall, too. Maybe they came from eBay.
* Not his real name!
** His real name!!